Memorial Day 2012

Welcome to the unofficial beginning of summer everybody.  Memorial Day is the first real weekend throughout the year that people take off of work, go on vacation, and party.  This is all good, and lots of fun, but does anyone remember what this special holiday weekend is about?  Beer, swimming, boardwalks?  Wrong.  It is about honoring the men and women serving in the military or the veterans who have moved on in their lives?  Nope, wrong again.  You can pay tribute at some speech, sure, but that should be where it ends.  Memorial Day isn't about those serving or served, it is about those who served and never made it home.

This week's rant has a little more of a somber tone because this is a topic that gets me fired up each and every year.  I just want you to think about it, Veteran's Day...what does that sound like?  It sounds to me like a day to salute the military who are serving and have once served, yes?  Memorial Day...how about that?  It doesn't sound like a day to salute the young PFC who is six days in service.  Unless of course the PFC was killed.  Memorial Day is a day to honor the dead, and we all should salute to their sacrifices.  Those men and women who went ahead to fight and never again saw our country with the own eyes.  Those boys and girls who kissed their parents and friends goodbye, saying "I'll be back soon guys," and that was the last conversation they ever had with them.  Imagine that if you even can.  I don't think any of us can fully imagine a loss of this magnitude unless you have been through it yourself. 

I have seen people buried, I have seen Marines dressed in their best, trying to hold back tears.  I have seen flags handed to mothers who were laying their sons down.  I have an issue with this being a free weekend and no one remembers, or even cares what it is all about.  This holiday is bigger than any of us deserve because we are still able to read, write, talk, drink beer, watch baseball, and whatever else the dead can't.  With that being said, don't wish me a "Happy" Memorial Day.  This is a depressing day in my opinion, and I have no want to be wished anything "happy" when we should be paying our respects.  If you have ignored everything else I have written, listen to this one.  You don't have to stop having a good time, just remember why it is you have been given a three day weekend, and remember who gave it to you.


RIP to my brothers and sisters in arms who have died, are presently dying, and will die from this day on.

Mother's Day 2012

Hey dads, I have a question for you.  How many of you went shopping on Mother's Day?  I suppose the better question would be how many of you picked up a card on your way home from where you were or went to the grocery store to pick up stuff for a special dinner you thought of this morning?  I wonder how much thought goes into such a day that is supposed to honor the most important thing to a lot of us. 

I was out on Sunday getting a haircut and picking up some stuff for school.  I went to the grocery store to grab some things that we needed for dinner, and I got quite a laugh.  I think that this particular store had never been seen so many men at one time.  It was like a mass exodus to the store to gather the necessary supplies to create a banquet.  While this is not necessarily a negative thing, the looks on the faces throughout the store was.  It was almost as if a herd of cattle had found its way out of the pen and into the local store by accident.  What's more, it appears that almost no one in the store had any idea where they were going.

Although this has brought me to a weird place in my head.  First, why was I at this store at the same time as this mass movement of the lemmings?  Lucky me had to pick up some things for dinner at the store that happens to be in the same shopping center as where I was getting a trim and some school stuff.  Secondly, why was every guy from my area there?  The feeling in the air was that of total confusion with the goal at hand.  The ones with kids didn't seem to know how to shop and parent and the ones without didn't know how to shop.

I just want to say, good try guys.  I applaud your attempts to show love through a hastily designed dinner plan.  I kid, I kid, but I really do give you ten points for at least trying.  Maybe next time, do it before 4:00 on Mother's Day.  Oh, and to the guy buying a card...shame sir, just shame.  Normally I say to ignore the rant every week as most of you know.  This week however, listen to the rant and find the humor in it.  Next year, take her out to dinner.  That's it, rant over

Letter to the Driver on the Phone

To The Driver On The Phone,

Hi, how are you?  I hope everything is ok because it seems you are in quite a spot because you are going 50 in a 25 while talking on the phone.  Oh, and not just talking on the phone, but holding it next to your face while it is on speaker.  This is much safer and much more convenient than actually holding the phone to you head, no doubt.  But did you know that there is no statistical difference, as it pertains to safety, between holding your phone while on speaker, and holding the phone to your ear, as it was designed?  So is it really more convenient or do you just feel like more of a movie star because your phone has speaker mode?

If you feel the need to endanger this quiet country town by doubling the speed limit, the least you can do is hold the phone correctly.  I do not condone this behavior, even if holding the phone as designed, but I think you wouldn't look like such a fool.  Oh and maybe, if you weren't on the phone and speeding, you would have seen those kids on bikes trying to cross the street in the crosswalk.  Maybe you could have seen the school bus that tried to pull out and then slammed on the brakes so you could go by. 

Now, while this activity is technically legal, you are an idiot.  We all talk on the phone while driving.  Some more than others, of course, but you still seem an idiot in this particular case.  A school bus, some kids on bikes, and every car on the road wasn't enough to get you to pay attention and drive responsibly.  That is just my observation, but I really wonder what would catch your focus.  Is it the dead kid on the hood of your car, or the loss of the use of your legs after you smash into the side of a tractor trailer?  Don't mind me, I just wonder things sometimes.  Either way, beings as you drive a minivan (notice a trend?), and are obviously very important, you will certainly ignore me.  Just like last week, minivan driver, captain of the world, best person alive, just ignore the rant, and keep on flying.

Sincerely,

Mr. Wiggles

Stupid Yard/Stupid Me

Greetings to you, readers.  We have just recently gone over the 200 views count.  I feel as if that is reason to celebrate and to rant about myself for once.  To point the finger squarely in the mirror you might say.  I know, for some of you, a celebration should have cake and candles, or even presents, but I thought poking fun at the person complaining about everyone else would be a good read as well.  Enjoy!

How many times have you let something go, until it was nearly impossible to complete, or even get the motivation to start?  An example of this would be letting your house get so dirty that you absolutely do not want to clean it at all.  Another example would be when you let your grass grow so long that you CAN"T cut it.  Has that ever happened to anyone before?  It did to me and it made cutting a manageable yard take twice the time it should have.  This is not a big deal, I know, but it is very annoying.  Let a yard go long enough and you will have 10 inch tall, super fine grass that clogs the mower, sticks to the sides, and shuts it off.  You can't see the dog's toys throughout the yard, so you get to run all of them over too, and shuts the mower off.  You can't see rocks or sticks strewn throughout the yard, so you get to run them over, and then the mower shuts off.  You can't see anything in the grass, so you run everything over and the mower shuts off.  Sounds like so much fun, right?

To continue the fun, the grass is wet.  When the grass is wet and long, like today, you have to cut the tall spots more than once.  Why?  Well because I was too lazy to cut it up until now.  As a result of this, I had to cut the yard twice in order to get the job completed.  We live on a serious hill and that did nothing to assist me in my trials against the jungle in the yard.  I kept expecting to find a car back there somewhere, but it never happened.  Now imagine pushing a mower up a hill, the mower getting jammed and shutting off every three or four steps, and then stepping in dog poop every three or four steps after you restart it, and then hitting a rock or a stick and the mower shutting off again.  It should paint a humerous picture in your head of what took place today.  It wasn't hard, it was just a massive annoyance.  That is all.  Sometimes you would prefer a job be difficult, rather than annoying, because an annoying job eats at you the rest of the day.  After it eats at you all day, you write about it and make yourself a fool for the internet to see.  Lucky me!  That's it for this week, I hope you enjoyed it.  Don't mind me, just a crazed lunatic here, ranting away as normal.  See you all next time.